Artists: soul suckers of the night

Designers: whatever I pull out of my laundry basket, really.

Authors: Wilde, Palahniuk, Fitzgerald, Shakespeare, Hornby.

Books: Anything with a fucked up storyline or that promotes fantasy of aristocracy is fine with me.

Bands: We'll just cut to the chase and say that odds are, my music taste is supremely better than yours.

Actors: Anyone who can play a good villain.

Clothes: winter clothes

Things: free margaritas and late night alcohol picnics in millennium park

Artists I hate: the myspace subculture who fully believe a camera flash in the mirror is artsy.

Designers I hate: Michael Kors for being pretentious and above all else BORING

Authors I hate: Mark Twain could go here, and all talk show hosts who decide to write self help books.

Books I hate: The Adventures of Huck Finn and The Color Purple. I want all the time I wasted on those books back.

Bands I hate: Too many. But mostly, Pete Wentz-Simpson.

Actors I hate: Leonardo DiCaprio mostly. See Also: All pop-stars gone actors and actresses and vice versa. OH, and Nicholas Cage except in The Weatherman and National Treasure.

Clothes I hate: Cell phone antennas do not belong sticking out of your cleavage. It is neither chic nor hygienic, and only makes me think maybe you should've chosen to wear something other than a low cut tank top and short skirt, which your watermelon breasts and cellulite covered ass hangs out of. Stop it.

Things I hate: almost everything, but mostly la crosse, wisconsin.